It's been a while since my last update. It means I have been very busy with my journey and it is only tonight that I got a chance to just sit down, reflect, and review the past few months.
My journey has been going through ups and downs, rough and smooth, joy and tears. Things just happen unpredictably and I love how exciting they actually go. I have been VERY BUSY traveling around and doing a lot of things for work to deliver my work demands. Those are very exciting and new experiences, so there was so much joy and fun. I met new people and witnessed awesome stories of inspiration. I am getting more adjusted to the nature of my work, my work environment, and my work mates. Those are the ups, and I think you can easily imagine it. WORK as you were CALLED. I knew beforehand that this is exactly where God has called me to work, and everything is just perfect.
So, there goes the downs too... things that are painful, and will bring you to tears along the way... Recent experiences just taught me very important lessons.
What I realized is that, even if you open your eyes to understand each one better, not all of them would treat you back the same. Because most of the time, people judge you based on their own experiences and culture. So, if their experiences are pretty much limited, and yours is a little bit broad, they'll end up judging with the limitations they have. No blame to those people, but now I know I need to be more aware and self-conscious. I just had to learn it the painful way. That's the stubborn love of God... You learn things harder when they're worth remembering well :)
I also feel so bad about the victims of the recent typhoon that hit my country. Many of the victims were also victims of last year's typhoon and haven't fully recovered yet. I wonder how much trauma the children experienced.... I pray for YHWH's mercy for my country.
And my journey will still continue... this is just a brief summary of what I've been up to lately. Or, what my journey had for me lately :)
Peace!
And here's another interesting update! Just recently experimented on agreeing to pose for advertising a weekly theological talk at a seminary. It was fun and exciting, and the first tryout shoot turned well :P (says the photographer). I don't know if I'll pick modelling as a career, though. I love eating!
Living in the city where you are offered every good thing everyone would want to have is a big challenge. One, with the meager resources that I have, it is impossible to acquire every single thing my eyes would desire. Two, at the end of the day, what really matters is only the things you NEED, not all the things you WANT.
I grew up in a simple family with a very simple lifestyle. My parents would make sure we only spend what fits on our "budget" - a very tight budget for our whole family. Being raised that way makes me appreciate the things I have, and it made me be contented with what I already have, not craving for something that looks better, or costs higher, when I already own something that serves the same purpose. That made me live with the principle, "if you can live without it, you don't need to die for it."
Right now, I live in an environment where consumerism bugs me all the time. There are offers on buying things I don't necessarily need, or desiring things I can actually live without. There is also one culture of consumerism that begins to annoy me. There is a trend (at least among people my age), of treating your friends out for dinner or snack. Usually, my friends would do that. At first, I liked it because then I get to save a bit on my budget. However, they get back on you sometimes by forcing you to treat them with some things that costs even more than the amount they gave you for free. It keeps on happening and I am totally hating that fact.
Why? Of course there is nothing wrong in treating your friends. But sometimes it just becomes dragging when you are forced to spend money on things that would sacrifice your budget for your savings, or on my case my budget for some other things like helping out with ministry activities.
There is completely nothing wrong with the idea of buying the things you want, as long as you can afford it. But right now I am disliking the fact that people sometimes (consciously or unconsciously) force you to spend money on things you don't actually plan to spend on.
Personally, I have very strict rules on budgeting. Not that I am thrifty, I actually love treating people! But I want to make sure that I save a bulk of my budget for meaningful things. It becomes hard when people around you gets you out of control.
Truly, this is just a minor issue, but this is a big part of the challenge that I know God is putting me to test. May the Lord give me strength as I endure the temptations of consumerism around me.
I feel like it's been a while since I last updated you about my journey. Or probably, a lot has just happened that I feel so overwhelmed at this moment. I should recall that a few months ago, I shared about the beginning of my journey with several people: the Peace Church, the Evangelical Youth for Social Action, my Barkman family, and I haven't told you yet about my new job (for almost four months now), with a very welcoming NGO called Sulong CARHRIHL. I am in a roller coaster of emotions the past month, and the only energy that sustains me is that coming from the Great Comforter.
The past month has been busy both for my work and my ministry. During the first week of the month, Peace Church started gathering its first community members as we learn and share together with our visitors -Dr. Jack and his wife, Irene Suderman. We learned about the 96 Images of the Church in the New Testament. We shared various dreams, experiences, and hopes for a church that will be a presence of Jesus in this conflicted society. We also organized two different lectures on the "Gospel of Peace and Social Transformation," and "A Biblical Survey of Peace and the Gospel," in partnership with the Asian Theological Seminary.
Meanwhile, September is also celebrated as the National Peace Consciousness Month. Therefore, working in an organization that promotes peace means that this month is a busy month. We organized several activities, and I even traveled to Mindanao for a week to conduct activities that are in line with the peace month and the UN declared International Day of Peace (September 21). I went to Davao City to speak on a School Forum about the "Youth as Catalysts of an Inclusive Peace." I also traveled to North Cotabato for the launching of a CARHRIHL Monitoring team in the Municipality of Makilala. CARHRIHL, I must say, stands for Comprehensive Agreement on Respect for Human Rights and International Humanitarian Law.
So, work-wise and ministry-wise, the past month has been busy and exhausting for me. Behind the exhaustion, however, is the inner joy I felt with the new learning experiences, new people I met, new places I visited, new food I tasted, and most especially, my reunion with old friends and family at Peacebuilders Community and Coffee for Peace. It was such a blessing to be able to reunite with the people I used to work with.
Anyway, this month was supposed to be a more relaxing month, but I was proven wrong. October is celebrated as the National Indigenous People's Month. So, next week I'll be traveling again to celebrate the IP festival with different Indigenous People groups. It gives me so much excitement and thrill to once again listen to the journeys of our IP brothers and sisters. After that, I'd still have to travel to several other places until the end of the month.
I also anticipate another Peace Church gathering by the end of the month. We just had our first "service" last Sunday, and it was a blessing to be able to reflect on the Scripture as a community where everyone is free to share insights and reflections.
Lately, I've also been going through journeys of the people I grew up with. I was able to reunite and share with someone I used to see as a mentor- and to hear his journey, and to hear stories of conflict in the church I grew up in... helped me realize that the people who have once been part of my journey, would always be part of me, no matter how long we do not see each other. Every person I share my life and journey with, would always have an impact on me. And that alone, makes me appreciate more the people that I am currently journeying with.
When everything gets tough, there a few important things a journeyist must NEVER forget: to kneel down and pray, and to share your journey with someone. Now my greatest realization is that, a radical journeyist's guide to a fulfilling journey, is PEOPLE. When my journey gets tough, it's the people around me, and their prayers...that keeps me going!
A Review of the book, "The Naked Anabaptist" by Stuart Murray
The book was very well written and can be easily understood by any type of reader, even those who just bumped into Anabaptism and who have no background about it. I love how Stuart Murray discussed the history of Anabaptists and comprehensively researched on its roots and the people who were first involved in this movement. It is inspiring, as an Anabaptist, to read further about the tradition that I grew up with, and understand more about its core convictions and even its weaknesses. I love how he expounded on each of the seven core convictions that spell out what it means to be Anabaptists today, which are:
1. Jesus is our example, teacher, friend, redeemer, and Lord. He is the source of our life, the central reference point for our faith and lifestyle, for our understanding of church, and our engagement with the society. We are committed to following Jesus as well as worshiping Him.
2. Jesus is the focal point of God’s revelation. We are committed to a Jesus-centered approachto the Bible, and to the community of faith as the primary context in which we read the Bible and discern and apply its implications for discipleship.
3. Western culture is slowly emerging from the Christendom era, when church and state jointly presided over a society in which almost all were assumed to be Christian. Whatever its positive contributions on values and institutions, Christendom seriously distorted the gospel, marginalized Jesus, and has left the church ill equipped for mission in a post-Christendom culture. As we reflect on this, we are committed to learning from the experience and perspectives of movements such as Anabaptism that rejected standard Christendom assumptions and pursued alternative ways of thinking and behaving.
4. The frequent association of the church with status, wealth, and force is inappropriate for followers of Jesus and damages our witness. We are committed to exploring ways of being good news to the poor, powerless, and persecuted, aware that such discipleship may attract opposition, resulting in suffering and sometimes ultimately martyrdom.
5. Churches are called to be committed communities of discipleship and mission, places of friendship, mutual accountability, and multivoiced worship. As we eat together, sharing bread and wine, we sustain hope as we seek God’s kingdom together. We are committed to nurturing and developing such churches, in which young and old are valued, leadership is consultative, roles are related to gifts rather than gender, and baptism is for believers.
6. Spirituality and economics are interconnected. In an individualist and consumerist culture and in a world where economic injustice is rife, we are committed to finding ways of living simply, sharing generously, caring for creation, and working for justice.
7. Peace is at the heart of the gospel. As followers of Jesus in a divided and violent world, we are committed to finding nonviolent alternatives and to learning how to make peace between individuals, within and among churches, in society, and between nations.
These core covictions have implications to how the Anabaptist churches, no matter what clothes they wear, continue to live in peace, being able to actively relate to one another in harmony, while at the same time economically and socially responsible.
He also quoted David Augsburger’s definition of spirituality in the Anabaptist tradition as “tripolar – the spirituality of personal transformation (the inner journey), the experience of divine encounter (the God-ward journey), and the relation of integrity and solidarity with the neighbor (the co-human journey with friend and enemy, with neighbor and persecutor) cannot be divided. Tripolar spirituality sees all three as interdependent.”
For me, this vividly describes my personal experience as having grown in an Anabaptist Mennonite church, and struggling between keeping myself safe within the boundaries of the comfort of my church family or going out on the streets to deal with poverty, injustice, and conflict in my society (the way Jesus would).
Anabaptism, however, also has its own flaws. Stuart Murray described them as: legalism, selectivity, intellectualism/anti-intellectualism, divisiveness, separatism, quietism, and inertia. They were each explained in the book, and he talked about how the Anabaptist tradition in itself is not the perfect way of interpreting the Scripture. He affirms though that there are many things that other traditions can learn from Anabaptism, and that this tradition has a lot to offer to the post-Christendom era where many people are already being moved to become a church that is actively engaged in societal transformation.
The Naked Anabaptist is eye-opening, challenging, exciting, and indulging. It is a fresh new way of understanding Anabaptist tradition without the boringness of other theological books. It was educational and informative, especially for people who are just beginning to understand deeper what it means to be a follower of Jesus.
In writing this, my heart is in peace; and my heart goes out to the many peace workers who have come and gone, and to the many more who are currently sacrificing their lives for the cause of peace.
I am struggling right now, and am having so many difficulties figuring out so many information that are being fed to my 22-year old brain. I am tired thinking. I am exhausted. Yet in this exhaustion and quest for answers, I see the faces of many wounded peace workers. Their passion, creativity, and enthusiasm will tell you that they are excited doing peacebuilding work. Their eyes, however, tell a different story.
Oftentimes, I listen to the soft voices of peace workers crying out for peace. I would feel their hearts beat the same way as mine, yet their eyes, when you look closely, will bring you to a window where you could see wounds of past and present. Wounds that are so deep and remain unhealed. Wounds that are caused by fighting for the bloody battle of "peace building".
The window to these souls will bring you to an empty, dark room, where the smell of blood and injustice is so overpowering, and you'll hear a heartbeat that is almost fading. The cry for peace is so loud, yet the voices are weakening. Slowly, I come to realize, peace work makes one vulnerable to many open wounds.
In my youth and in my early years in peace building, I tend to get scared of what lies ahead. I'm afraid that later I would get so wounded inside, while struggling to move forward every single day of my life - for the cause of peace.
This struggle leads me to reflect on why I am doing this, and how my journey has been so far. My reflections lead me back to Jesus. As a response to the calling of God, I chose to follow Jesus by way of peace building work. It was not easy, and it is never going to be.
In the past, I have already been wounded. I have even experienced the point of nothingness - of struggling because I can no longer find meaning in my own life while I try to work for others to find meaning in theirs. It was devastating. And yet, now I have been completely healed from those wounds. I have been restored. I have been re-energized, and even reconciled to wounded relationships.
I wonder why others seem to have not recovered at all from wounds of the past. Then in searching the Word, I found the answer, which is Jesus. Jesus might be the missing piece of the puzzle that others are struggling to find. Jesus, the Prince of Peace, who has come to reconcile man to God, is often times left on the margins. Often times, Jesus is even forgotten and not included in the picture of peace.
But Jesus is the ultimate source of peace. Jesus should be the blood that flows through every veins of the peace networks ever existing in the world. Jesus "is" the heart of peace building. Without Jesus, peace building is but another attempt of the world to make a better world - but to no success.
World peace, in essence, is not possible without Jesus. Now I understand better why the peace that Jesus gives, is not the kind of peace that the world can EVER offer.
The PEACE of JESUS TRANSFORMS the heart and soul. The peace of Jesus, among others, HEALS all kinds of WOUNDS. Day to day, as one struggles for peace, only when we allow Jesus to transform our lives would we ever attain peace, and thus be able to pass it on to others.
Today, at 22, I am very vulnerable. I will still get wounded, over and over. Yet the wounds I will acquire, I completely surrender to the Prince of Peace, whose wounds have saved my soul.
I am leaving you at peace. I am giving you my own peace. I am not giving it to you as the world gives. So don't let your hearts be troubled, and don't be afraid.-John 14:27
Mula pa noong isang araw ay walang patid na ang pagpatak ng ulan. Ulan na kay lakas at may kasamang hangin. Walang tigil. Ito'y hindi bagyo. Ito'y tinawag lamang na hanging "habagat".
Tatlong araw na mula nang dumating ang walang tigil na pagbuhos ng ulan - ito'y luha ng kalangitan, ayon sa iilan. Ito raw ay galit ng Diyos, sapagkat marami ang nagnanais na maisabatas ang RHBill. Isang panukalang batas na naglalayong makatulong sa mas nakararaming kababayan upang maiwasan ang patuloy na paglala ng kahirapan. Ngunit para sa iilan na makitid ang kokote, ito raw ay sa demonyo. (@%#!) Hindi gumagamit ng lohika!
May mga iilan, sarili ang iniisip. Nagdiriwang sa baha, sapagkat mawawalan ng pasok sa eskwela. Ngunit sa likod ng bakasyon na ito, juskopo ang daming tao ang nagdurusa sapagkat lumubog ang mga kagamitan, walang makain, at walang matulugan. Nakukuha pang magdiwang. tsk.
Sa aking munting paraan, pinilit kong makibahagi sa pagtulong. Pinilit na sa abot ng makakaya, ay makidamay at magbigay suporta sa mga taong nasakuna. Alam kong hindi ito sapat, at ayokong ito'y ipagkalat. Ngunit iyon lamang ang maliit na bagay na aking kinaya.
Nagdurugo ang aking puso, pagkat saksi ako kung paanong karamihan sa aking mga kababayan ang nabubuhay sa isang kahig isang tuka. Batid kong ang kanilang kabuhayan ay nakasalalay sa pang araw-araw na pagkayod. Ngunit sa mga ganitong pagkakataon na sila'y hindi makapagkayod, ano na lamang ang kanilang ipapasak sa kumakalam na sikmura?
Sa mga ganitong pagkakataon na ang kanilang mga munting barong-barong ay binaha, naputikan, at ang ilang kagamitan ay nabasa, ano na lamang ang kanilang gagawin sa araw ng bukas?
Kumukurot sa aking puso na sila'y makitang nananatiling nakangiti at tumatawa sa gitna ng bahay na sira-sira. Ako'y nahihiya kapag sila'y nag-aalok ng mauupuan, makakain, at kung anu-ano pa, gayong sila itong nawalan at na sakuna. Isang pagpapala ang ganitong karanasan, ngunit dalangin kong ang mga taong ito'y lubusan rin naman pagpalain ni Yahweh. Na ang kanilang mga pangangailangan ay matustusan. Nawa ang kanilang mga kalusugan ay maingatan, at ang kanilang kinabukasan ay matiyak na may patutunguhan.
Yahweh, Ako'y pinagpala sa araw na ito. Isang pagpapala ang mga bagong karanasan. Ngunit, magtatapos ang araw na ito na may sakit sa aking puso. Sakit na hindi ko matukoy, sapagkat napakalalim ng pinag-uugatan. Sakit na bunga ng pagtanto na napakaraming tao ang nagdurusa, gayong may iilan ang nakikinabang sa mga kayamanan na dapat sana ay pantay-pantay naming pinaghahatian. Ama, ako'y umiiyak sa awa. Awa para sa aking mga kababayan, awa para sa aking bayan, at awa para sa mga taong lumalangoy sa salapi at pagiging ganid. Yahweh, ikaw ang nakababatid. Alam mo ang aming kalagayan. Magulo. Magulo ang paligid. Magulo ang mga kaisipan, magulo ang mga tao. Sa gitna ng mga unos na ito, Ama, aking hiling na ako'y bigyan Mo ng sapat na karunungan upang matuklasan kung ano ang iyong layunin sa mga pangyayaring nagaganap. Ama, nawa sa lahat ng ito, maunawaan namin at madama ang iyong pag-ibig at pagpapala. Nawa, bilang Iyong tagasunod ay maging daluyan ako ng pag-ibig, pagpapala, at kapayapaan, na hindi nababalutan ng anumang pangalan ng simbahan o anumang samahan. Ikaw lamang ang papupurihan! At sa aking pagtulog, dama ko pa rin ang kirot sa aking puso, ngunit ang sakit na ito ay gamitin Mo, upang ako ay lumago. Amen
So, last time I mentioned something about missing coffee. I did! In fact, when I say coffee, it's not just simply any other kind of coffee. What I mean by coffee that I miss is Coffee for Peace (CFP) - Fairly Traded coffee that when you sip, you know you made a farmer smile because he was paid for a fair price for his coffee. When I lived in Davao, I used to have unlimited brewed coffee at CFP every single day. The last time I had a sip was in January, so it was really a long time and I have been badly longing for that good coffee again.
Yesterday, a friend from Davao brought me a small bag of CFP coffee and I was so excited to drink it that I actually had 2 cups last night and then another four cups the whole day today (now, it's all gone) :-)
Me and the precious CFP Arabica coffee :)
This afternoon, I met a new friend whose last name is Coffey, and we both had coffee together at a coffee shop near my office. What's interesting is that, the coffee shop serves PEABERRY coffee. It caught my attention on the Menu and I knew right after seeing it that I must taste that coffee.
What's with peaberry?
Well, it's more expensive compared to regular coffee beans because they are rare. Usually, a coffee cherry would produce two coffee beans. Peaberries are single beans formed out of one cherry, so they are more dense and flavorful.
When I lived in a coffee farm almost a year ago, we always saw peaberries among the tons of coffee cherries that we de-pulp everyday. It was when Keith and Jenna, my Canadian companions said that peaberry can be sold at a more expensive price, that Ate Kriz (my super Ate) and I actually got more curious about how it tastes. And today was a dream come true - I finally tasted peaberry coffee right on the day I least expected it :)
So, fifth cup today is peaberry coffee!
I praise God for a great coffee day today: four cups of CFP coffee, one cup of peaberry coffee, and a new friend whose last name is Coffey :)
#Satisfaction
For those who are curious, here is the comparison.
On the left side is a peaberry, and on the right side is a regular coffee bean.
Photo downloaded from: drinks.seriouseats.com
My heart sings this song out loud. I want to obey the Lord. I don't wanna go anywhere else than where He wants me to be. Call me crazy or a fool...
Today, I sit on my office table and ask myself the same question I ask every single day: "What will I do today?"
Every day the answer I could think of is this: Work!
Definitely. I go to the office to work. This is my job. But aside from the daily routine of facing my computer screen all day and doing tasks that were assigned for me to do, what is the essence of what I'm doing?
Still, the past events of my life come back to me and almost every single day, I ask myself why I am in this specific place, at this specific time, doing what I'm specifically doing? And the hardest question still is: Why am I doing this?
As I was on my daily scriptural reading this morning, I figured out the answer to my hardest question. I am here because I wanted to obey. To simply obey. Things may not be as easy as I have expected. In fact, sometimes I wanted to go back to that moment in my life six months ago and see if there is anything I could do to change the decisions I have made for myself. When I look back to that moment six months ago, and review what has happened to my life now, I have no regrets. I knew I just obeyed.
I may not yet be as happy as I used to be back then. I may be missing a lot of things, and I may be dreaming and hoping that I never had to make that decision. But there is one thing that's always better than the feeling of happiness - PEACE.
My heart is crying right now. The tears it sheds have nowhere to be placed. I keep it inside. This is how I release it. I miss people. I miss laughter. I miss fun. I miss playing. I miss coffee... But I am here now because I have to be here. I needed to just obey.
Obedience to God doesn't always mean you have to be happy one hundred percent of the time. Obedience sometimes may also mean you have to sacrifice several things - sometimes, they have to be things that make you happy or comfortable.
But how do I know that I was obeying His will? There is peace. Peace I have in my heart that I haven't felt for a long time. Peace in every situation that I encounter. Peace I feel every time I learn new things about my new job, and the spark of hope that there is some valuable reason why I am right here, right now. Peace in the new relationships I am building with the people around me.
Yeah, following God is not at all easy. But He provides the energy, comfort, and peace that we would ever need along this journey called life.
Live life in obedience to the One who has called you!
Twenty hours of sitting on a bus and my bum is sore
Didn’t have a good sleep, Oh! How dreadful this is!
I opened my eyes to see how dangerous the road was,
and to my surprise, Behold! I saw beauty!
It’s my first time to witness this side of the country
Huge mountains bouncing green, with rivers binding them together
In the province of Ifugao, I was on a journey
and the rice terraces told my soul another story
My journey is like climbing up a mountain
At first you feel excited and you even run to get there fast
But eventually you get tired and you have no choice
but to rest even for just a little while
When you start your second wind, you will realize
You are better, you can run faster, more energized, and more
dedicated to finish til the end
In the midst of my sore bum, my spirit was refreshed
My mind was rejuvenated, my soul re-energized
In the midst of a long and tiresome journey,
I had a glimpse of God’s glory
And this majestic view has taught me
to appreciate life’s simple blessings...
Life’s
Simple Blessings
The bus leaves not on the appointed time, but only when all the
passengers are there and ready to go.
Witnessing the gigantic mountains and being reminded how small I am
and how big God is; how blessed I am that this big God loves me as I
am
When children play with toys that you have seen for the first time,
because they are made of pieces of wood and an extraordinarily
creative mind
When there’s only one narrow road, but buses and trucks give way
for each other
When you have a sore bum, yet you were blessed to see God’s awesome
creation
When you set out on a journey with two people you just got to know,
but you trust that they will be part of your long journey ahead... to
teach you, mentor you, laugh and eat with you, and work together.
Where I got the title: For the past few weeks I have been thinking about how I'd update you about my journey. I can't think of a nice title, and thus I can't even start writing an entry. Today I encountered this song that I've heard a couple of times before, and thought it was just a plain love song. When I played it and read the lyrics, I thought it was just a perfect theme song for me now! It was not just a romantic song after all! It is a song about the beginning of a JOURNEY.. how we find people on the same journey with us - most often surprisingly, and how we commit to journeying together with a friend, or maybe even strangers. Enjoy playing the song while you read! :)
So, a couple of weeks ago, I have been VERY busy. After three months of being unoccupied, I suddenly became my normal self again - traveled a lot, met a lot of people, and ate a lot of good food! :) I would say, God might have really given me a good rest for a couple of months because he was preparing me to set out on a journey with much more passion, and much more lessons to learn. I would be enumerating the highlights of my experiences - or I would call them BEGINNING OF A JOURNEY:
Last year, I met a bunch of young people who were on a journey towards peacebuilding among young people in Metro Manila. I was so much blessed to hear their story and somehow called myself an "adopted" member of this group. This group is working with fraternities and gangs around Manila, committed to provide an alternative environment so that these groups would no longer result to violence and frat/gang wars. It was exciting to see how this organization managed to grow and have more dedicated members. I kept connection with them only through facebook, not knowing when I could actually work with them closely - or if that would even be possible.
Three weeks ago, they invited me to join their Leadership for Peace Training, and even welcomed me as a new member of their organization. I willingly committed to be part of their journey. We all do not know what lies ahead and what we could actually be doing together. All we know is that God is calling us as young people to be active followers of Jesus by doing something for the society. That is enough to declare that we are "at the beginning" of a journey together, and that we are committed to be on this journey together, no matter what lies ahead.
The Evangelical Youth for Social Action
Leadership for Peace Training
June 7-10, 2012
Three weeks ago, the Barkman family arrived in the Philippines to start planting Peace Church Philippines, rooted in Anabaptist-Mennonite doctrine. They are a young couple with two little boys, and they managed to travel around Luzon so far, excellently.
Peace Church is in partnership with the Integrated Mennonite Church of the Philippines (IMC). I currently serve as the National Coordinator for IMC and I had the chance to give them a tour around the IMC congregations throughout Luzon. Their visit to the IMC congregations allowed them to see a better picture of how the Mennonite church in the Philippines currently look like. It also allowed them to personally get to know the people behind the IMC, and the work that they do in their own areas.
For me personally, it was a blessing to get to know them while at the same time introducing them to IMC. I do not know how we would specifically work together in the future, but one thing for sure, we will be on the same journey in the years to come, and that is very exciting! I am not sure how far God would allow me to walk with the journey of Peace Church Philippines, but I am glad that "at the beginning" of the journey, we walked together.
3) Journey with the Integrated Mennonite Church of the Philippines (IMC)
I grew up loving the church, and I grew up dedicated to serving the church in any way possible. It is an honor and a blessing for me to be trusted as the National Coordinator for the IMC at this point in my life. Honestly, I have no idea what God is preparing me for, but right now I feel like I am just "at the beginning" of a wonderful journey that God has for me.
There are a lot of uncertainties, trials, and even heartbreaking moments that would challenge my dedication and commitment, but I always remind myself that I am committed first to God, and then to the church. My commitment to serving the church is backed by a dream of seeing a new breed of IMC leaders who would stand up and make a great impact to the society. I dream of an IMC where all the leaders work harmoniously with each other, and where all the members are building a harmonious relationship in their own communities, inspiring lives, transforming societies, and declaring the gospel of the Prince of Peace.
4) Journey with the Barkman Family
Spending a couple of weeks with the PeaceChurch planters has actually created a personal connection between me and the Barkman family. We were just strangers weaved on the same journey, and it is my delight to actually spend time with them. What seemed to be a professional task for me, created a personal relationship with this great family.
It was a joy and a blessing for me to spend time with Darnell and Christina, and their sons Cody and Makai. This wonderful, Christ-centered family is the kind of family I dream of having someday.
Darnell and Christina (my ate and kuya), have been very supportive of me and the ministry that I do, and they are a huge encouragement for me. To me, they are examples that I can follow in many different ways - spirituality, relationship, family, and personality. There is just so much lesson I learn just from talking to them, eating with them, watching them take care of their kids, and even just sitting with them on a 5-hour bus ride. :)
Cody and Makai are the kind of children that I dream of having someday. Aside from being cute boys (as most babies are), I could see how God has designed them perfectly to become missionary kids. Cody's friendliness and wit is a blessing that brings delight to every single person he meets. Makai's strength as a 2-month old baby that traveled half-way around the world shows how much God is protecting him, and it amazes people who find out how much he is already going through despite being very very young. :) As I only had one younger sibling and we are only two years apart, it is my first time to actually try being a "full-time" Ate (big sister). It is a blessing that God gave me these two wonderful kids to play with, and to have special times with. The moments we shared are moments I would never forget even when they grow old. :)
The Barkman Family
[Christina, Cody, Darnell, Makai, and Ate (me) :)]
The past couple of weeks have been very busy for me, and yet I anticipate the next few days to be more surprising, busy, inspiring, encouraging, and challenging. Whatever else may happen next, I'm pretty sure:
"... life is a road that I wanna keep going Love is a river, I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road, now and forever, wonderful journey
Life is like picking coffee cherries. You should pick only the ripe ones, which is always red. Leave the green and yellowish ones and wait for it to ripen. Throw the brown, overripe ones because they are no longer good.
In life, we should also pick the red ones - the present. Enjoy the situations when it is ripe. Savor every moment we spend because we can never put it back. Live for today and enjoy today.
The green cherries are like the future. We should wait for it patiently. Wait as that green cherry slowly ripens, until the day that it is ready for harvest. When we rush to pick it sooner, we cannot enjoy the best taste that it can offer. Life is like that. When we rush to see what's in store for the future, when we shorten our waiting period by not undergoing the right processes, we tend to end up in the wrong situation, full of regrets.
The brown and maroon cherries are like the past. What is done is done, and we can never get back there. Just throw it away. Leave the past in our memory and live in the present. Most people who look back to the past and live with regrets or longings to change something that should have been done in the past, end up not having a wonderful present and future. So, as a coffee cherry, just throw it away. Our past hurts, frustrations, regrets, lessons. Use them to strengthen our present and future, but never be driven by the past guilts.
Pick the red, ripe coffee cherries. Live in the present. Enjoy today. Wait patiently for the future, and leave the past behind.
When you plant a coffee tree, it will take three years before it grows and bears fruits. Beginning from the seed, planting and taking care of a coffee tree is a serious task. A coffee farmer must wait for a few months before transplanting a coffee seedling into its permanent location. After the transplant, several processes are done to make sure that no insect (borer) will destroy the fruits. I must be describing it shortly here, but in real life, three years is a long wait.
If a farmer intends to plant coffee to make a living, he has to be sure that he also plants other short-term crops so that he will still have food on the table while waiting for his coffee to grow.
Waiting for a coffee tree to grow, while making all necessary (and not very easy) tasks to take care of a coffee tree, without the assurance that it will bear good fruits, requires a lot of PATIENCE.
In real life, patience, as they say it, is a virtue. It takes patience, as a child, to wait slowly as you grow and gain knowledge and experience. It takes patience to wait as you slowly work your way up to earning a college degree. It takes patience for one to wait for his/her dreams to come true. It takes patience in waiting for your prayers to be answered. It takes patience as God unfolds His will for you - day-to-day, and He only requires you to wait.
Patience.
Patience.
Patience.
See. Waiting is not easy. But the Prophet Isaiah clearly explains the essence of waiting in Isaiah 40:31:
"But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint."
These coffee trees are about one-year old. Two more years and a good harvest
of coffee is much-awaited. If only the coffee farmers would wait patiently.
Okay, so the Countdown to 22 ended already. But to be fair, I wanted to just update you on what really happened on my 22nd birthday. I told you it would be an "ORDINARY" day. But I realized now that it was full of extraordinary fun and laughter!
MAY 12, 2012- SATURDAY
I woke up rather late, because I slept early in the morning. My parents left home early for a retreat with the church members of the church that my dad is pastoring. I preferred to stay at home, because I promised the youth at church that I would teach them how to make chocolates that we would be giving away to the mothers for "Mother's Day" celebration the following day. My eldest sister also stayed at home with me.
My best friend, Rio, came in early while I was still busy cleaning the house and preparing for the chocolate-making day which was just really an ordinary task for me. Eben and Kim were both in the Province of Pangasinan for a meeting, so they weren't there.
My niece, Thea, the daughter of my cousin who passed away last February (which I talked about in the 10 Challenges of my life #8: death), came with her mom. They visited my cousin's grave, and every time they do that, they would pass by our home. They didn't know it was my birthday, but that surprise visit was remarkable. I got to spend a few hours with my one and only niece! They just stayed for a few hours and I gave them a ride to the nearest stop where they could get a ride home.
So, here is Jonna (Thea's mom), Thea, and me. Thea was playing with our cute little puppies here :)
Afterwards, I fetched my new friend, Kuya Brian, which I came to know only recently. He is a very gifted and talented musician, and it was a joy to have him visit me for a few hours on my birthday!
The young boys at church, whom my brother is discipling, also came to visit and help with the chocolate-making. One of them actually didn't know it was my birthday, and he was the one surprised! haha... So, silly and funny as they are, they made up a scripted "Surprise greeting!" for me! Here is a video of that silly moment, but I would always treasure these young boys who are turning out to be promising leaders. These are Archie, Mark, and Randy! :)
So the three boys were so energetic and funny the whole day, which made me laugh a thousand times! Later, more young people from church arrived. Ate Fely Ann, one of my trusted sisters and friends at church came to help with the chocolate-making. Soon, Jely, Glydel, Ian, and Kezia also came to help. The children at church (our Sunday School students) also dropped by for a while. We all shared some spaghetti that my mom cooked for the day. It was almost evening when one of the young pastors, Kuya Jun2x, who was also a good friend of mine, came to greet me and we had a lot of fun together. Making jokes, stories, and taking photos! Alongside making chocolates for the mothers.
Mark, Archie, Randy, me, Rio, and Kuya Brian (the serious-looking guy) LOL
After we wrapped the chocolates, they had to leave for church to practice for the Sunday Worship singing. I stayed at home to wash all the dishes that we used, and to clean the house.
That's me, Mark, and Archie.
Back row: The kids, Jely, Rio, and Ate Fely Ann
Here we are showing off the Red Chocolates that we made for the mothers.
Ian, Kuya Jun2x, ate Fely Ann, and Me!
Front: Randy, Archie
Back: Ian, Glydel, Kuya Jun, Mark, Ate Fely Ann, Me, Jely, and Kezia
The Red-rose looking chocolates that we made for the entire day! :)
Later, my brother Eben called to greet me a happy birthday. My best friend Kim also talked to me. I was supposed to be with them on that trip to Hundred Islands in Pangasinan, but it didn't happen, so these two naughty boys were teasing me and trying to make me envy them for their adventure.
Later in the evening, the church musicians - Emman, Romnick, and Toto passed by our house to greet me. It was very touching!
Aside from the personal greetings and phone calls, I also received more than a hundred greetings on Facebook! I was touched not by the number of people who greeted me, but for the heart-warming messages that I received from some of them.
The highlight of the FB greetings were the twovideos created by the Peacebuilders Community, Inc. (PBCI) staff that I happened to work with during my last few months with PBCI. It was very touching and moving. There is something about them and the video they created, that made me cry. Yeah, I badly miss them and the work that we used to do together. But like Angie said, they know that I am happy right now. Knowing that I have them in my heart and that they have me in their hearts, is enough to make my 22nd birthday happy.
So, right! My 22nd birthday was just an ordinary day. It was busy and tiring, and we didn't have much food, but this day I was reminded that I am very rich. My treasures are these people who have become a part of my 22 years of existence on earth. The people who greeted me and gave me touching messages... they are my treasures! Probably you, you who are constantly reading my blog posts. You are my treasure! :)
"Ordinary day. No party, no special treat. No special someone to visit me. No adventure, no special activity. It is, like the rest of the year, an ordinary day. Later, I would be left home alone. I will be busy with things I would normally do. But today, is the day I was born 22 years ago. And for 22 years, my life has been filled with overflowing blessings. Today is an ordinary day, just like the past 8030 days of my life...B L E S S E D."
The countdown series was my effort to release a part of me. It was my way of letting go of so many things, of wrapping up all my experiences and challenges so far, of recognizing people who have been important to my life, and valuing things that I love doing the most. It was my way of simply letting you know me better, as much as I make an effort to know my inner self more and more. The countdown to 22 ends now. But, as the days pass, and as the will of the Father unfolds before me, I will keep you updated!
There is nothing really special being a 22-year old, but this is a period in my life when I finally start to embrace what I am called to do. This is the time I finally tell myself that my childhood days are over, teenage years are but a memory, and adulthood begins. I am not in a hurry to get old. In fact, I struggled a lot for the past years of how I have always been given responsibilities that I thought were bigger than my age. I badly wanted to stay young, to do things I used to do when I was young, and be with people I have always been with since I was young.
Today is the day I accept and embrace my calling. I am slowly embracing the responsibilities that I forcefully accepted before. I am embracing the responsibilities that are being given to me, understanding better why I was the one doing it and for Whom. I am accepting the challenges that life still has to offer. I welcome my 23rd year with a smile, having no regrets with my past decisions, and with inner peace and joy.
I am now 22. I am ready to face the new challenges set before me. I am ready to shed more tears, share more smiles, burst a thousand more laughters, and touch more hearts and lives of people. I am ready to make new friends, fall in love, and exhaust myself with more fun and adventure!
I am now 22. And like the past years, I offer this day to the only reason why my heart is beating. I offer this day and my years to my Creator, my Father, my Protector, Provider, Healer, Comforter, and Friend - to my Savior, Jesus Christ!
Welcome to my Radical Journey as a 22-year old!
I open my arms and my heart to the promise of the Lord in Jeremiah 29:11:
"For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord.
'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future."
1 more day and it's THE DAY! I will have no party, no special treat, no place to go, to special someone to meet. It is an ordinary day like the rest of the year. But tomorrow, I'm turning 22. And tomorrow, I am embracing something big! So now, I want to share you one of the many answered prayers in my life. And I want to encourage you to pray and let God lead the way, because He really answers prayers!
1 Published
Yes. One of my childhood dreams was to get published even at a local newspaper. And then, growing up, I prayed that I would be able to write about the History of the Mennonites in the Philippines. I had no idea how to do it and when that would be. I just had that desire in my heart.
With my first job, I was assigned to become the National Coordinator of the Mennonite Church in the Philippines. I eagerly accepted the responsibility and committed to God and to the church that I will serve with all my heart. I am doing it for the Lord, expecting nothing in return.
As the National Coordinator, I was asked to write the Philippine chapter for the Mennonite World Conference (MWC)- Global Anabaptist History Book Series. I was surprised and delighted to accept the task even if I was given only a short period to finish it. After two months of prayer and hard work, I finally sent the chapter to the editors. I received positive feedbacks from the editors and only waited for the day that the book will be published. On November 2011, the Asia Volume of the Global Mennonite History Series was launched. And...
...
Chapter 6 is about the Mennonites in the Philippines authored by "yours truly"...
So this it! I am published at age 21! It is only a short chapter, but it IS an answered prayer!
Today, I still dream of becoming a published writer. I should have included this in my article yesterday,haha... but I dream of writing books, essays, and inspirational thoughts for children, young people, women, and everyone! I dream of using this gift that God has entrusted me, so that I could be able to share my story of salvation to people around the world!
More to go! :)
Tomorrow, I'm turning 22....
There will be more stories I will write about in the future... :)And more prayers to be answered!
Me and the book... :) The FIRST published work of mine...
I have been religiously posting bits and pieces of information about myself, people related to me, food, experiences, and everything else I have done and wanted to do. Only two more days to go and it's my 22nd birthday!
Today, I want to tell you about two of my greatest dreams. Two of my greatest. Yes, I have so many dreams, and all of them are great (why not?). But here are two greatest dreams that I want to share you because I guess, among all my dreams, these are the nearest to reality and coming true.
1 To be a world traveler
Traveling is my passion. It is something I just naturally love. I have written so many articles about traveling and about the places I visited. In fact, I have written about my Top 9 Favorite Places in this countdown to 22 series. I have been to three countries outside the Philippines, and I feel like my radical journey is just about to begin soon. My dream is to travel the world. My dream is to travel the world and not just take pictures or eat at some famous restaurants.
My dream is to travel the world and leave a mark in those countries I visit.
I dream of visiting the 7 continents and go to as much country as I could, and do something there. Inspire someone, share a story to one person, or make friends with another. Anything simple.
I dream of traveling the world to generously offer a sweet smile that can change the mood of one person for an entire day.
I dream of traveling the world to inspire even a few children to grow up dreaming big.
I dream of traveling the world to pray for someone sick, someone with a broken heart, someone without a family, or someone who has lost hopes in life.
I dream of traveling the world to touch people's lives. I dream of traveling the world and share my own simple story - of being a sinner, saved and blessed by the grace of the Creator.
I dream of traveling the world - to see the awesome creation of the Creator.
I dream of traveling the world - to hear the thousands of languages of different tribes and people.
I dream of traveling the world - to see the colors of our skin; that are so uniquely created according to our race.
I dream of traveling the world to share the beat of my heart; from one heart to another. If I could transfer my energies to every person I would meet, I would.
I dream of traveling the world. The world in which everything that is in it, belongs to my Father in Heaven. I dream of traveling the world. I dream to travel it - to fulfill my purpose.
2 To have a simple family
Most women dream of becoming a good wife and a mother. Mine is to only be a simple one. With my dream of traveling the world and becoming a good leader someday, I do not know how I could also become only a simple wife and a simple mother, to a very simple family that is dedicated to the Creator.
I dream of being that perfect wife for that perfect husband; to be a perfect partner in all of life's struggles and challenges, to be the best friend and best companion in every situation - good or bad.
I dream of becoming a perfect mother to the best children in the world. I dream of becoming a simple, loving, caring, smart mother to the future great leaders of the next generation. I dream of having a simple family that is always complete and loving.
I dream of raising children that will continue to lead the change that my generation is starting today. I dream of raising godly children. I dream of one simple, happy family!
We're down to three! Today, I want to talk about three people who, I believe I influenced, and in so many ways influenced me too. We grew up together at church and we had to be together because we had no choice. We were bound to be together. It was fate. It was destiny. Remember one of the challenges I talked about in the 10 Challenges of my life? #5: Church leadership. It was a period at our church when everyone who were before us suddenly seemed scattered and left us behind. The four of us! So, I was young then and they were younger than me. They were at the same grade level, and I was two years ahead of them. I was the older sister "ate" among us. I was challenged to lead them, to encourage them, to share visions together, and to simply be friends with them. It wasn't easy. But now, 11 years after our friendship started, we began to realize that we are best friends. Not because we chose to, but because we were tried and tested by life's struggles and challenges. Get to know the people I grew up with, and the people I envision growing old together with. :)
The four of us recently...
me, Kim, Rio, and Eben ;)
1 Rio
The musician.
When we were younger...She was that little girl I used to scold. She dislikes a lot of things, but easily likes simple things -very simple things. I found her exaggerated and emotional. She didn't have confidence and I had to push her for that. She wasn't confident about her talent and I had to show her that she has. She is a creative writer, but I am a technical writer, so sometimes I don't read her hearty and emotional novels! (haha)
Today...She is a very dear sister. She has bloomed into becoming one beautiful woman of God who uses her gifts to worship the Creator. A gifted musician. Beautiful voice. Most importantly, she has a gorgeous heart! She is one young woman who dreams of having her efforts appreciated - even in the smallest way possible. She cries over simple things, but dreams about big things! Her joy is to eat her heart out. Her happiness is to laugh with friends!
One petite woman with a giant passion for music. One small person with one great purpose!
Pretty ladies :)
There is so much reserved stories behind those beautiful smiles.
2 Kim
The versatile artist.
When we were younger...He was this taller-than-me-boy who was always sweet and friendly to everybody. He was branded "the backslider". He goes to church at summer and Christmas break, then doesn't show his face at all during the rest of the year. He is a brilliant actor, singer, and dancer! He became my accountability partner. His presence creates a difference wherever he is.
Today...He is still taller than me. He is still the same talented person. A versatile actor that can also sing and dance. His tears flowed when he heard his calling..but unlike before, he has grown into a dedicated man. He was my successor as the youth leader. A tall man with big dreams, and big efforts to reach those dreams. He is a very promising leader, with a very promising future as a man of God. He sings through the storms of life and dances through the challenges of leadership.
One bright person with a truly bright future. One dynamic guy with one clear vision: to serve the Lord.
A "friend" one will always be proud of...
3 Eben
The director.
When we were younger...he was the bullied boy. One who was always laughed at because of his new and fairly intriguing ideas. As my brother, he was sometimes annoying for me. Annoying because I had to look after him, and he was a very notorious debater, so I struggle with my leadership with him. He was a gifted artist, director, painter, and singer.
Today...I was surprised how time swiftly passed by. He is now the leader at church. With his leadership, I am reminded that my leadership was successful. With his new and promising plans for the future, I remember the days when those ideas were laughed at. His passion reminds me of my own. His dedication reflects my own dedication.
He is one artistic person that has artistic and radical vision. One great leader with a hope of mentoring more great leaders to rise.
Best friend and brother...
So, all of them are artists! All of them are talented! I am not an artist, not a musician, not a singer, nor a dancer. I can act a bit, but not much. Among the four of us, I am the least artistically inclined person, but I will always be proud of how great these three younger friends have been. Every time I see them and their achievements, my heart leap for joy. Every time I see them cry and get hurt, my heart bleeds for them. Every time they dream big dreams for the future, I jump and cheer for them! I may not be as talented as they are, but I guess, my purpose was to simply let them know... how great people they are! And for me, that purpose... is more than enough!
1 Dried fish (Tuyo)
My all-time favorite, unique Filipino dish that I really love and am proud of! My lovely "tuyo!"haha... I don't know what's with this stuff that I love the most, but I definitely just can't resist eating it!haha... When I eat tuyo, I eat the most cups of rice ever! It's salty, meaty taste is what I love the most! Not that it is healthy, but you can actually cook it in various ways! Cook it with soupy vegetables, saute with vegetables or noodles, and whatever else you want to try it with! It is the best protein substitute when you go on a survival area, and it is also a best partner of a Filipino favorite - champorado!
Tuyo is best served with fried rice and tomatoes...hmmmm!!!
2 Coffee
Best for breakfast, snacks, lunch, and even after dinner. I grew up learning to love the smell of coffee and enjoying drinking it almost any time of the day! It was a special privilege when I had the chance to have a coffee research study in a coffee farm. I even wrote a comic book for coffee farmers about the basics of coffee from seed to cup. It was then that I realized that coffee takes a tedious process before it gets into my cup. Coffee is a precious drink. It was precious to me before, but now I treat coffee as gold. I have learned a lot working with Coffee for Peace, Inc. in Davao City, and since then, Arabica coffee has been my favorite! I enjoy Arabica brewed and black, but I also love the variety when it is served to me in different ways at coffee shops :)
I love coffee for what it is...
and I love all the coffee farmers behind one precious cup of coffee...
3 Egg (Scrambled, Sunny side-up, boiled, or whatever)
"An egg a day is OK" says a slogan in one of the restaurants near my university when I was in college. I loved it! Every time I pass by that restaurant, I smile! The reason behind me liking the slogan is that, in fact, I love egg! I like it boiled, scrambled, sunny side-up. I eat it with rice, bread, or porridge. I love egg when it is cooked into "leche flan" or egg pie. I love that most pastries are made with dozens of eggs. And I love that my favorite recipe, cream puffs, also require dozens of eggs! So, I love the egg for what it is and whatever you can make of it. I even like it raw, mixed with my favorite soda! (haha..try it too!) Also, I love that eggs are produced and handled in a very delicate way before it gets into my refrigerator. So, egg is definitely ok!!!
Sunny side-up! :) is okay!
4 Buko Salad
I have a special taste bud for sweets. I just love them! But I don't know what is there with buko salad (coconut salad), but it is my favorite! I love that you can mix it with anything and enjoy it's awesome taste! I love that you can eat it frozen or just cold. I love that you can put it in a small plate, cup, or even in a plastic bag! I love the coconut in it...plus the cheese... the milky taste,.. the other ingredients you mix with it... Bottomline is, I love coconut! And whatever else you mix with it to make it into a salad! :)
Five days to go! And I have been talking a lot about my past experiences and everything I have tried already. So today, I want to share you top 5 Countries that I dream of visiting. I want to get to these countries, even just for a day, a week, a month, or a year! Here goes the list:
1 Canada
Since I was a child, I have always heard of Canada. I thought it was just someplace away from home. It was in grade school I realized that Canada is a country halfway around the world. I have relatives in Canada, and now I have gained friends and networks in that country. So, Canada will always be number one in my dream country list. I wish it will be too soon that I have to go there! :)
2 Israel
Since my Sunday School days, Israel has been one of the countries I have heard from the Bible. I thought it was an imaginary place just like any other place in novels, but I soon also realized that Israel, the birthplace of Jesus Christ, is a real country. I dream of visiting this precious country so that I will be able to walk on the streets that Jesus walked in to. I want to experience the Bible times in the smallest way possible. :)
3 Egypt
Like Israel, Egypt is another country I have always heard of. Actually, what I dream visiting in Egypt are the Great Pyramids. I really wish someday I will be able to get a glimpse of these precious ancient heritage from our Egyptian forefathers. Also, I am a secret fan of Egyptian attire. :) For me, they're really unique!
4 Japan
Japan has been a country listed in our history. My first impression of Japan is negative, because of two main reasons: 1) Japan terrorized the Philippines and abused thousands of comfort women in our history; and 2) Modern Filipino women now go to Japan to work as entertainers or prostitutes. So, when I was a child, I NEVER wanted to go to Japan. Lately, however, I have gained Japanese friends and realized, history would always be a ghost that haunts us, but what matters most is the present. I want to see this modern country, and of course, visit friends!
5 France
Europe is my dream continent! I always wanted to explore Europe and experience its awesome architecture, food, and hear the sweet languages they have. But if I have to choose only one country, I would love to choose France. It has a romantic impression on me, and I want to experience just that. :) But maybe, this will have to wait until I have someone to go along with me!haha
